[B] Surviving IIITK - Food Edition
Q&A style with a pinch of sarcasm and an extra helping of struggle
Author - Bavishya
Q: What’s the best way to survive on a budget in college?
A: Welcome to IIITK, where your wallet is as empty as your resolve after trying to understand algorithms. The good news? You can feed yourself on a budget, even if that budget is... questionable at best. The last thing you want to do after a full day of pretending to pay attention in lectures is cook an actual meal.
There’s an entire universe of snacks that require zero effort.
First stop: Maggi. Ah, yes, the unofficial national dish of college students. It’s simple, it's nostalgic, and most importantly, you don’t need culinary skills to make it. It’s not going to win any Michelin stars, but you’ll have enough energy to do things like sleep through your 9 AM class. Again. Sure, you might start hallucinating about actual vegetables after your 50th pack, but that’s what multivitamins are for, right?
If you’re bored of Maggi (it will happen), switch to samosas from Milma, the staple of the students here. Sure, it’s deep-fried, and your mom might not approve, but hey, they’re practically full meals in portable form. For ₹15, you can get a samosa and a side of regret, but at least you’ll be full.
When all else fails, Idli from the Millet Cafe is your best friend. It’s cheap, it's filling, and it’s the closest thing to a homemade meal without calling your mom.
Instant oatmeal: It’s like cereal’s warm, mushy cousin. Sure, it looks like something a horse would eat, but at least it’ll make you feel like you’re health-conscious.
Q: How do I navigate the mess food without losing my will to live?
A: Ah, the hostel mess. Or as I like to call it, “a daily exercise in managing expectations.” Think of it as a survival training camp. Here are some tips to avoid the worst of it:
Breakfast is your safest bet. There’s only so much that can go wrong with idli-sambar or vada pav. If they mess up vada pav, you’re legally allowed to riot.
Curry roulette is a real thing (you’re gambling with your digestive system). If the curry looks too red, it’s probably 95% oil. Stick to curd rice. When in doubt, always ask yourself, "Do I want to taste spice or be the spice?"
Avoid special occasion meals. When they say “festive biryani,” what they really mean is rice with a sprinkle of masala and a mystery meat that you’ll be thinking about long after dinner is over (for all the wrong reasons).
Stick to the salad bar. It’s hard to mess up raw vegetables, right? (I hope).
Q: How do I avoid common mistakes?
A: Look, I’m not going to lie to you: you’re probably going to eat a lot of pizza. That’s just college law. I don’t make the rules. But if you’re determined to dodge the dreaded event—aka the weight that mysteriously appears when you’re no longer under parental supervision—there are ways to slow it down (the weight gain, not the existential crisis).
Here are some highly scientific tips:
Chai isn’t water. Yes, I know it feels like the lifeblood of your day, but at least try to drink some actual water. Real, actual, H₂O. (Fun fact: it’s free, and it doesn’t come with a sugar overload).
Walk to class—and by "walk," I mean don’t hop on a scooter like some kind of Silicon Valley startup bro. Use those legs. If your campus is huge, walking to class can help burn off that extra samosa you snuck in between lectures. Plus, it gives you time to contemplate whether that degree is worth all this effort. (Spoiler: it probably is).
Limit late-night snacking. The temptation to order Pizza Hut at 10 PM is strong, but try to limit it to a once-in-a-blue-moon occasion. And no, Parle-G biscuits at midnight are not a balanced meal. They’re delicious, but not balanced.
Snack smarter—replace your Kurkure binge with healthier options like almonds. Will you hate it? Absolutely. Will it help? Debatable, but at least you’ll feel smug about it.
Q: What if I’m too lazy to cook in my hostel?
A: Cooking? In college? Hilarious. But in case you’re feeling ambitious (or have run out of pocket money for Zomato orders), here are some low-effort, no-skill-required options (Disclaimer: it’s not easy, but it sounds motivational if I say that).
Maggi, of course. If you haven’t mastered Maggi-making, are you even in college? Throw in some veggies if you’re feeling fancy (or just guilt-ridden about your lack of nutrition).
Bread and peanut butter. You don’t need a stove, and you definitely don’t need your life together to enjoy this classic. Add a banana if you’re pretending to care about your health.
Instant dosa batter. Pour, flip, eat. No one will know you didn’t grind that batter from scratch like some sort of culinary prodigy. Pair with some store-bought chutney, and boom—you’ve successfully tricked yourself into thinking you’re a functional adult. Gives you more time to focus on your real priorities: Netflix and existential dread.
Q: Is chai a food group?
A: In India? Absolutely. You’re either a chai person, a coffee person, or an energy drink person (we don’t talk about that last one). Chai is the unofficial food group that fuels late-night study sessions, long train journeys, and 90% of your conversations with friends.
It’s not a balanced diet, but it’s a balanced life choice. Just remember: limit yourself to 1-2 cups a day unless you want to see the universe vibrating in front of your eyes.
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